She decided to share her heart in a reminder that I think we all need to hear. Often.
Life is not perfect. I have a job that doesn’t feel very secure at the moment. I have a chronic autoimmune disease. I need to lose weight. I never seem to have enough money. I want an extra 2-3 hours each day. I need a new car. I don’t get enough sleep. I’m the single parent of a special needs child - - life is a tad stressful.
In the past year, there were moments when I have wanted
to kill The Boy. There were times when
I was so frustrated
I could barely contain it. There were instances
when I was afraid
and felt desperate. There were
times when I felt defeated
and times I felt at the
mercy of ‘the system’. And there
were days that exhausted
me mentally, physically and emotionally.
These are the things for which I am the most grateful - - perhaps not individually,
but in totality.
Those of us with children with special needs tend to live in
the extreme- at the edges of the norm.
The frustration, anger, desperation, exhaustion and fear make the accomplishments
that much sweeter. The extreme brings me
understanding. It allows me to find laughter
in the ridiculous, joy
in the mundane and peace in the
typical.
Being ‘grateful’ is a constant goal in my life (because sometimes
I need the reminder). Regardless of the little
hiccups in the day to day - our life is so
good. I am so thankful for all the opportunities that we have been afforded; especially for the people who make the good so much better and the bad a little more tolerable even when I’m feeling sorry for myself.
I’m thankful for all
those in the special needs community who have come before me and lighted the
way and to those who are coming up behind me and help me remember where we’ve
been and how far we’ve come by telling their stories. I’m thankful to Tiffany
for (once again) giving me the opportunity to tell our story and say what I
think in a way I may not have thought about without her.
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